I'm not sure I need a Doula. Do I?
9/17/20263 min read
If you are pregnant and wondering whether you need a doula, you are definitely not alone.
Perhaps you have heard friends talk about doulas, seen them mentioned on Instagram, or started thinking about your birth and wondered whether having someone alongside you would actually make a difference.
And maybe you are thinking, "But I already have a midwife. My partner will be there. Do I really need a doula?"
The honest answer is that you might not. A doula is not an essential part of having a baby. But for some women, having continuous emotional, practical and informational support can make a huge difference to how they experience pregnancy, birth and those early days with their baby.
But what's the difference between a midwife and a doula?
This is probably the question I get asked most.
A midwife has a clinical role. They are there to look after your health and your baby's health, monitor your labour and make sure everything is progressing safely. They are highly trained healthcare professionals and are a really important part of your maternity care.
A doula has a non-clinical role. I am not there to monitor your baby's heartbeat, take your blood pressure or carry out vaginal examinations.
I'm there to focus on you.
One of the biggest differences is continuity.
Depending on where you give birth and how your maternity service works, you may not have met the midwife who is looking after you when you arrive in labour. They may be brilliant and incredibly supportive, but they are still meeting you for the first time.
Your doula is someone you have already spent time with. You have talked about what matters to you, what you're worried about, what helps you feel calm and how you'd like your partner to be involved.
So when labour gets going, there is already a relationship there.
What does a doula actually do?
A doula is there to provide continuous emotional and practical support before, during and after birth.
That might mean helping you think through your birth preferences during pregnancy, suggesting different positions or comfort measures in labour, helping you create a calm environment, making you a drink, supporting your partner or simply reminding you of things you already know when your brain has gone completely out of the window!
Sometimes the most valuable thing a doula does is simply stay.
When your midwife needs to carry out observations, complete paperwork, speak to the wider maternity team or step away because another woman needs care, your doula can remain with you.
I'm not there instead of your midwife. I'm there alongside you.
What about my partner?
A doula doesn't replace your partner either.
In fact, supporting your partner is a big part of what I do. Birth can be intense for partners too, particularly when it is their first experience of labour.
I can give them ideas about how to support you, reassure them when things feel unfamiliar and give them a chance to grab a drink, eat something or take a breather without leaving you on your own.
You still experience the birth together. I'm simply another person in your corner.
So, do you need a doula?
Maybe.
You might value doula support if you want someone who already knows you beside you during labour, would like more time to talk through your options, want practical support for yourself and your partner, or simply want someone whose whole focus is on helping you feel supported.
And if you decide that a doula isn't for you, that's absolutely fine too.
For me, doula support isn't about convincing you that you need me. It's about making sure you know that you have the option.
If you're curious about what having a doula could look like for you, I'd love to have a chat. No pressure, no commitment, just a friendly conversation about what you're looking for and how I might be able to support you.